Sometimes people ask me questions like it must be really lonely being single for so long, and I think to myself well I don’t really have a big issue with loneliness. Loneliness as we know is a feeling of being alone that we can feel whether we are by ourselves or not; while being alone is simply being by ourselves.
It is not necessarily a bad thing to be by ourselves. Sometimes, it can be a good thing. When I am by myself, I get a lot done because I don’t have someone to distract me. How one feels being alone, can depend on her personality. For example, if a person is an introvert like I am, that person may need that alone time to recharge before going back into the world mingling around people.
Whereas an extrovert, on the other hand may feel overwhelmed from being alone. Whatever the personality, I’ve learned that giving of your time, and talent to others can be one of the best anecdotes for loneliness and it helps in personal development as well.
Just a few weeks ago, I ran into a staff leader from a group that I used to serve in while in college. It was amazing how everything that I learned serving with him, I am still currently using in my personal ministry. As a young person, I would visit a group called InterVarsity Christian Fellowship and one day the members of the group nominated me to be a leader. I had no clue as to what I’d be doing, but it seemed fun to do something new.
In the process, I discovered that I had a gift to teach, and deal with people among other things. Of course, our gifts need to be developed or else our gifts will just lie dormant, and go unused. What better way to develop our gifts is there then to volunteer our gifts and talents under the instruction of those already operating in their gifts, we can do nothing but flourish.
For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. 1 Timothy 1:6 (NIV)
The next time a holiday comes along where singles tend to feel some type of way, why not, check and see if there is someone in need of your unique gifts or abilities where you can serve them. In turn, you are really serving yourself, because you become developed, establish healthy self-esteem after utilizing your gifts, and healthy relationships with others along the way.
The Single life is not a sentence to lonely and unproductive days wondering and wishes for a date. The Single life can be very purposeful, and full of all types of joy and triumph if we allow it. Let’s consider others as singles, and watch God see to it that we are considered as well in personal growth, and fellowship with others.
Don’t be misled–you cannot mock the justice of God. You will always harvest what you plant. Galatians 6:7 (NLT)
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