Don’t Just Desire Marriage, Desire God’s Standard for Marriage!

Don’t Just Desire Marriage, Desire God’s Standard for Marriage

Marriage is clearly a good thing to desire, but it cannot become a greater desire in our lives than living to please God. If we do allow the desire for marriage to become greater than our desire to please God, it becomes an idol in our lives. Idols are only counterfeits for the real thing. This means that when we worship idols of any kind we set ourselves up to invite counterfeit replicas of the real thing into our lives.

God has more for us his daughters than counterfeits. God’s word says that he has come to give us life and that more abundantly. God’s word also says the below promising us all things needed:

He that spared not His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things? – Romans 8:32

The above scripture promises us all things needed including godly marriage for those God has placed that desire in. We can have that if we believe that. Somehow many women have failed to believe that is for them, and that they can experience marriage God’s way and so they settle. We settle against God’s command not to be unequally yoked together with an unbeliever.

We’ve looked to marriage as an idol to heal us from the pain that is causing us to make the poor choice of choosing an unbeliever in the first place. Often that pain comes from a sense of lack. We lack love from a potential spouse. We lack loving ourselves, and we may not be properly receiving the love of God at that moment.

Proof that God loves us isn’t an easy care-free life. It’s a life of overcoming. It’s his grace making our paths straight when we so easily get off track. It’s many things and people that God has placed in our lives. Sometimes, we have to pray for God to open our eyes and cause us to see what we really do have instead of focusing on what we lack.

When we view anything as an idol; that idol becomes our lesson of how much we genuinely need God. The idol becomes our lesson on how much we genuinely need to submit to doing things God’s way. There is a scripture that confirms this. See below:

When you cry out for help, let your collection of idols save you! The wind will carry all of them off, a mere breath will blow them away. But whoever takes refuge in me will inherit the land and possess my holy mountain.” – Isaiah 57:13

God will remove his hand of protection enough for those trusting in idols to see that the idol is insufficient to heal, deliver, and sustain, but those who trust in the Lord will inherit the promises of God.

Could your idolatry of marriage be a trust issue? Is there something that occurred in your life and heart that caused you to lose your trust in God? What can you do to restore that trust in him? Believe me, sis! I’ve been there before myself. I remember being at a point in my life where I was so broken that it became a strain for me to trust God concerning the area of an appropriate spouse. At that point, a counterfeit was sent into my life, but the awesome thing is God was with me throughout every disappointment and experience.

It was awesome! I cannot lie to anyone about my walk, the only reason that I overcame was because of God being with me. I remember a prophet coming to my job and affirming me where I needed to be affirmed about who I was and why I was not allowed to be with just any guy. Then the prophet said and now Satan is going to try to get you to have sex. Sure enough, that is what my counterfeit wanted, but I made sure those boundaries were strong as the Lord allowed him to be removed out of my life.

You see, God will protect us because we are his and we are highly valuable. We have to cooperate with the Lord, however. When we operate out of rebellion seeking to make things work with a counterfeit despite God’s warning, we are setting ourselves up for more pain. No one in this world will escape dealing with some type of pain. It is better to go through with God than against God.

This post is to help you evaluate where you are in your decision for a lifelong partner. Again, there is nothing wrong with desiring that, but we have to make sure we desire to please God first meaning we aren’t letting down God’s standard for us just to have a man. 

We should be using our single time wisely by enjoying it, growing and learning about ourselves, being made firm in our identity and purpose, and simply enjoying intimate fellowship with the Lord. This will provide for us the stability and discernment to choose a suitable match for us. We can then, choose someone who has been doing the same thing in his singleness and two whole people can get together for the glory of God.