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Lessons Girls Like Paige Can Learn from Married at First Sight

It’s our responsibility as women to guard our hearts while getting to know a guy before going all-in:
It’s our responsibility as women to guard our hearts while getting to know a guy not going all in, but instead practicing discernment. I know Paige was put into a unique situation by being married at first sight to a stranger, but the reality is still true that Chris is a stranger. With strangers, we hope for the best and judge behavior by looking out for our best interests. This is called practicing discernment. Discernment must be practiced when getting to know someone for a relationship instead of going all in. When we go all-in in the beginning without getting to know someone; we experience more hardship than we may have had to. We are harshly awakened to the reality of our lack of judgment with the sudden pain that is a result of us missing the clear red flags that were so clearly before us had we taken the time to look letting time reveal the mystery of who our potential love interest is.

Just because a guy says Jesus, he’s a Christian, or something churchy doesn’t mean he is a good match:
We’ve gotten to a place with some single women where the standard is just extremely low. Paige got so excited saying, yes and exclaiming how this relationship is God putting her together with Chris all because Chris said something religious. That is a low standard. Just because someone mentions religion doesn’t mean they are a good match or a good witness of that religion. Chris has a religious background and is deep in the church, but that doesn’t mean God’s character is deep in him. Simply put, Chris is immature. He needs to go through several trials and tribulations before coming to the maturity to take on a wife. He’d been going back and forth between his ex that he was engaged to 3 months before the show and the idea of being with Paige. Recently, we found out that not long before Married at First Sight he slept with his ex again and now she is pregnant. Paige has been bought into the middle of all of this unfairly knowing what she was getting herself into. Chris is what the Bible calls double-minded. A double-minded person is a dishonest person who is constantly between two opinions or choices not making up their mind for a particular path. The Bible goes on to say, “let not that man receive anything from God.” The Bible also says that every good and perfect gift comes from God. This lets us know it isn’t God putting this couple together, but man. If it were God, he would have waited until Chris was ready.

The Bible says that a double-minded man is unstable in all of his ways. This perfectly describes Chris. His life right now is unstable and he bought a stranger into his instability. Ladies, when a man is unstable, double-minded, and cannot decide if he really wants you or other women; leave him alone. He is not ready. Further, sometimes guys will stay with the girl they really don’t want because they think it’s the right thing to do. This creates more hurt for the girl, in this case, Paige later on down the line as she may have invested more into the relationship holding out for the hope of the man’s misleading signals. Chris is clearly sharing with us the audience on his video confessions that he feels trapped with Paige. He also shared how he did not feel that she was attractive to him. Why is he being dishonest with himself and staying? Paige would do well to look at this man’s actions and not just listen to his words that do not add up.

Your only purpose in life is not marriage:
Paige has said again and again her only purpose in life is to get married and have kids. Marriage is honorable and so is raising children, but that cannot be our only purpose in life because we aren’t married from the womb to the tomb. There is in-between time and sometimes lots of in-between time. Will we avoid walking in purpose before marriage or if our marriage partner dies leaving us widowed? No.

We have to get rid of this imbalanced idea that we aren’t walking in purpose or really living our lives until we are married. This backward thinking causes many women to look past red-flags that should be caught at the gate just to be married. We don’t want to be miserably married; we want to be wisely married to someone who compliments who we are. This takes growth and maturity. It takes self-awareness and self-discovery of ourselves and our purposes before marriage not just after marriage.

Thankfully, many Millennials are wising up and deciding to marry later after they’ve done some work on themselves and grown, so they will not bring unnecessary baggage into their marriage relationship. This is frowned on by some who pressure Christians and especially Christian women to simply marry without teaching them to practice proper discernment to choose a worthy partner. Many women and men put off their purpose or never discover their purpose because they allow the wrong relationships to distract them. I believe Paige is in a learning process like many other women and she will have to pay attention to what is going on to avoid dealing with a similar situation in the future. We don’t just want to be married. We want marriages that last.

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