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Forming Habits for Healthy Emotional Management – Part II

Repressed Emotions

Continuing on key points learned from Joyce’s book on managing our emotions; she discusses repressed emotions:

“People who repress pain and never learn to deal with it properly eventually explode or implode, and neither one is a good choice.”

I personally believe that some of the mental illness and depression that we see stems from repressed emotions and people not knowing how to deal with painful or shameful things that have happened to them. Joyce compared repressed emotions to something stinky in the fridge. If what is stinking isn’t found and dealt with, it will cause more problems and only get bigger.

Joyce shared a story about missionaries that she knew who recounted to her regarding a tribe in Indonesia called the Fayu tribe. This particular tribe sings songs made up on the spot to release negative things that have happened to them. They have a set time to mourn via singing their mourning songs. Once that time is up; life is back to normal as before. These people are known to have little to no depressive psychological disorders because they have processes for releasing negative events and emotions in non-threatening and non-harmful ways.

Dealing with Repressed Emotions is not to be confused with Rumination:

Rumination is when we constantly go over negative thoughts that cause negative feelings and emotions. See the definition below:

​”Rumination refers to the tendency to repetitively think about the causes, situational factors, and consequences of one’s negative emotional experience (Nolen-Hoeksema, 1991). Basically, rumination means that you continuously think about the various aspects of situations that are upsetting.” – Psychology Today

We have to find positive ways to deal with negative circumstances and afterward let it go not picking it back up again. This is why it’s so important that we be careful with what we allow ourselves to think on. We have to like the scriptures teach think on things that are good, true and of a good report (Philippians 4:8).

Joyce shares many helpful tips in her book about emotions including how to deal with various personality types of others. She shares several examples of how her husband Dave’s personality is different than hers and how she’s learned to deal with that in a manner where she doesn’t attempt to change him.

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