Doing Anger Well:

Doing anger well is when we’re angry and we choose not to sin while expressing our anger. This is indeed possible or else God’s word would not have said to be angry and do not sin.

What are some of the ways that we express our anger while sinning? Getting outside of character cursing or belittling someone instead of getting to the root of the problem. Also, acting in rage which could lead to more serious things like murder.

The idea is to use anger to our advantage. Chip Dodd, Author and Psychologist shares in his book, Patterns of the Heart that anger reveals our passions and what’s important to us. In other words, we aren’t angry just for the sake of being angry, but there are deeper concerns that we have that need to be addressed or heard. Our frustration shown in anger is simply a manifestation of not dealing with the deeper issue.

For example, recently I’d taken my mom to a doctor’s appointment and when we’d gotten there, we were greeted with the news that she was not on the schedule. We were also asked questions that made me feel interrogated as though, I just walked into the office with my mom without following the established protocol.

I became upset and was visibly angry. I shared my concern of how I felt that they made a mistake and would not acknowledge it, but acted as if they were doing my mom a favor to squeeze her in and the kicker was that the scheduler lied saying I’d cancelled before-hand and cancelled the appointment. Thus, the manager of the facility tried to scold me as if I was the one lying.

I did not curse or belittle the woman whom I felt interrogated me as though I was lying. I simply stayed focused on the main grievance. Everything else is a distraction. After, I felt I did not get anywhere with her, I asked for her bosses’ info to write a letter. I was angry.

Finally, the woman came back and apologized saying she’d thought about what I’d said. The apology came after I showed her the call-log from the conversations I’d had with the scheduler. Even though I was right regarding the situation, had I acted out of character, the main issue would have never been resolved. Instead, I would have created an even bigger issue.

Thus, doing anger well, is a challenge of discipline and self-control to deal with the underlying issue at hand and get that resolved in order to put the anger to rest. When viewing anger as Chip Dodd says, it causes us to look at anger in a more positive way when used correctly; it can lead to greater understanding and more connected relationships.

Finally, the Bible gives us wisdom in sharing the below:”In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry. – Ephesians 4:6
We should not allow too much time to pass before we deal with that underlying issue. We should seek to get it resolved before we can ponder on that anger too much allowing it to grow into more than it needs to.