Walking in wholeness allows certain freedom that allows us to be vulnerable and to take risks. It’s necessary to take a risk for those who desire to be in a God-honoring relationship. Someone at some point has to let the other know s/he is interested in the other person. At which point, the other party will either agree or disagree to begin a process of getting to know one another.
Wholeness is a word for holistic health—meaning balance mentally, physically, emotionally, socially, and most importantly spiritually. The facets of wholeness begin and end with our intimate relationship with Christ. God’s word is not limited to only spiritual matters but deals with the whole man.
From God’s word we learn to have balanced financial habits, we learn the ins and outs about disappointment, hope, managing anger, and our emotions, how to make and maintain friends and relationships and so much more. Many of the disciplines that man studies such as psychology, sociology, health, and nutrition, the Word of God has something to say about it.
Fear is something that would hold us back from being vulnerable. We may fear rejection. However, if we’ve experienced any disappointments in life; we know that we can bounce back from disappointment. If we have a solid foundation of how we see ourselves and how we see God; it becomes all the more easier to bounce back. Seeing ourselves the way God sees us allows us to maintain a healthy view of ourselves whether we are rejected when making ourselves vulnerable or not.
What if we take the risk and the other person eventually agrees to begin a process of dating? We will never know if we are too afraid to take the risk. To be vulnerable means to open ourselves up to be wounded. It normally shows a level of trust for us to take that risk. We may trust that if we are wounded God can and will heal us. We may also trust that the person we are opening ourselves up to isn’t a harsh person who would be rude if we show ourselves vulnerable.
A person who walks in wholeness may feel disappointed if rejected. That’s human nature and s/he should feel the rejection. It’s a normal part of life that we all go through. However, the person who no longer believes s/he is worthy of love because someone turned them down is imbalanced and not walking in wholeness. Wholeness is a balanced and holistic view of one’s self and God. Remember the whole person views his/herself the way God views him/her. This means anything the Word of God has said of that person is true and anything contrary is a lie and must be dismissed according to 2 Corinthians 10:5.
We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. – 2 Corinthians 10:5
Those that are too afraid because they have not mastered seeing themselves how God sees them in his Word will continue to experience the frustration of staying in the same place because they are too afraid to trust, be vulnerable and take the risk. I don’t advise someone forcing their way out there to try to begin a relationship with someone if they do not see themselves properly. It will place an unnecessarily heavy burden on the relationship before it begins.
Do the necessary work while single of working through those insecurities that cause negative self-talk, unbelief, and crippling fear. Ask the Lord to teach you to embrace yourself and your value as He sees you and not from the view of your insecurities. The freedom that comes from doing the work will be worth it. Once ready, you’ll find yourself willing to take more risks in faith that someone is for you if this is a promise God’s given you. If it isn’t the current person of interest, it will be someone else and you’ll rest assured of this because you’ve embraced God’s perspective for you over your own.
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