As single women of God, we go through a lot. We are consistently faced with the feelings of being alone and rejection in lieu of our desires to love and to be loved. If we are not careful, we can allow our feelings to rob us out of our inheritance in Christ through devaluing ourselves.
Many women devalue themselves because of being tired of this struggle and give in to the pressure of settling for whatever comes her way. She loses those qualities that make her stand out to the spouse that God has for her taking on the identity of someone else instead. This isn’t God’s will for his daughters, but he gives us the unique strength to maintain who we are while realizing our value and worth along the way.
One of our most virtuous and sought after qualities that we carry as women being made into godly wives is our trustworthiness. I love how the King James version puts it below:
The heart of her husband does safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. Proverbs 31:11
In other words, a man with a virtuously trust worthy wife knows that he can go to work, out of town or wherever he has to go and have the peace to know that his wife will be faithful to him. Men of God hold that at high value and high prize. Some men have been so worried about this that they try to control their wives. Even worse, in some cultures of Africa women’s private area would be sewn up when the husband went to work, and un-sewn when he came home.
The fear of mistrust toward a bride is completely non-existent for the wise man who has been graced to get a virtuous woman of God. He finds a place of safety and rest in a trustworthy wife. He doesn’t have to wonder whether he has chosen the right one who will be faithful to him. He already knows that because a virtuous woman remains faithful to God during her season of singleness allowing herself to be made by the hand of God into the virtuous woman that the Bible speaks about.
Being single in a lot of ways is a process of being made to handle the maturity that comes with the marriage relationship. Romans puts hardship in this way:
Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character, and character, hope. Romans 5:3-4
There is a purpose in our suffering, that produces perseverance which is the ability to stick things out through the hard times even when the situation doesn’t change. Perseverance becomes a natural part of our character, and thus we walk straight into what it is that we were hoping for all along. God has to get us ready for the things that he has promised us. If only all singles male and female could get that revelation.
Ladies, we have to start knowing who we are and knowing our worth, so that when the enemy comes to us with lies saying that we will always be alone or rejected because we don’t put out and aren’t willing to compromise, we can respond with who we know we are encouraging ourselves in the Lord saying I am beautiful and I am trustworthy, and these qualities make me unique to the man that God has set aside for me. Not only that, but it’s through maintaining our identity in Christ that we can truly be ourselves, and maintain our God-given dignity.
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